And Bing-O was his name-O

I don't know what the Australian obsession is with shortening words and then closing it off with "o".

For example we have:
Document --> Doco
Presentation --> Preso
Magazine --> Mago
Wine --> Vino
Reconciliation --> Reco
David --> Dave-o
Jacqui --> Jaco

and the other day, there was this new one to add to my collection

Balcony --> Balco

I swore I would never do it. Way too Yobb--O for me. But when you're working with yoks around you all day, Pres--O and Doc--O happen to slip themselves in.

I've failed.

I also swore when talking about work, I would never say "We've just done this", or, "We just got ourselves a new whatever."
It would always be "My work has..." or "Where I work, they've...", it's a more disassociative phrasing, a me vs them type of thing, don't get too attached, keep work life as seperate as possible.
I've slipped into that too.

I feel so ashamed.

On the lighter side of life, my brother and his wife gave birth to a baby girl this morning. Mazels all round!
Hello niece number 5!

My pear has cancer!

Fruits and vegetables get tumours too!
I was eating my pear and stubmled across this benign growth. It's a little bit scary. I mean, it IS cancer. A patch of abnormal cells amongst all those normal ones.
It's a freak of nature.

I've even seen oranges with malignant spreads.

And, I sometimes even eat the cancers. You never know- it might be a delicacy. Most of the time they're just woody and gross. No real flavour. A whole lot of nothing.

You think all the apples in the same bushel get cancer? Something in their environment has caused the growth? Or it's just the one freak apple in the bunch?
Scientists could probably do a lot of studies on cancerous fruit. Look at the genetic makeup or somefing.

apple and Stage 2 growth

I think I would just love to see an E.R. style show but with fruits and vegetables. They would get those usual sicknesses, the same dramas would happen. Grey's Anatomy may be a better format actually.
They would all plucked right out of the Muppets Singing Food repertoire. Far out- they even have a profile on Muppet Wiki.
Would be pretty similar to that whole toothbrush gang. Man, I loved the toothbrush gang. And that's not the right link. If anyone can find that cartoon of all the different bathroom characters, I'll be indebted to you forever. And they weren't drawn. They were real objects with faces stuck on the most appropriate part of them that would suffice as a head.

I don't know who, but thank you

I don't know who I was talking to the other week, about the fabulous new movie "Thank you for smoking", but this morning I was mailed free, yes FREE, tickets!

Thanks!

umm, Did I also mention I really want to see Snakes on a Plane??

I don't know how in the hell I got on that mailing list and I definitely don't have any complaints.

Hang on one red hot second. On closer inspection it was for LAST weekend! My whole world has come tumbling down pretty quick.

No real problem though - a quick phone call to the Promotions Manager sorted that one out. Let's see what other goodies he's going to give me!

For a limited time only....

Go look at this video

I shan't regret it.

More shitty puns

I just got invited to this party, Stars behind bars.
I wish they would really put these 'Stars' behind bars!

One guy from Melbourne's claim to fame is that he is a "personality"!
That's it?!
What a wank.

And not to mention the name of this party is a shitty pun.

I hate puns.

Death by terror or death by boredom?

Which is a worse fate?

All this palaver with the aeroplanes is like some over protective parent brining in the reins in a totally irrational manner.
Qantas has a list of items banned to travel to the UK and the US.
I do understand the threat of terrorists attacks, but please, no magazines, no books, no food (here comes a starvation diet on my trip to Mexico)?
And is this finally the thing Microsoft needed in its quest to stave off the iPod sales figures?

It doesn't really make any sense. If you think about it, if you can put a bomb in your hand luggage, you can put a bomb in the hold too. A passenger on a plane would be in close enough proxmity (I reckon) to detonate the thing.
I wonder if writing this stuff gets me on some Government watch list?

BoingBoing was also mentioning that in US and British airports, authorities were pouring all confiscated liquids into large vats. So, even if the contents were explosive, mixed together in the same vat would surely be enough to cause some sort of reaction. Obviously someone is on the ball.

It's just getting a little ridiculous. 5 year old kids aren't allowed toys and coming from Australia I certainly don't want to have to sit on a 30 hour journey with my passport to read. I've engineered my travel kit to perfection and now it's all shot to shit.

Surely there has to be some better solution.

Back from the dead

Yes. I was meant to be taking a little break from this blogging adventure.
Some shite has happened (as always), none of it really bloggable. I think it has more to do with the fact that I can't be bothered so I choose it to not be bloggable.
I like this word- bloggable.

Some highlights included me having further allergic reactions, or a sty in the eye, my eye puffing up and choosing to wear an eyepatch out on the town to alleviate the hassle of needing to open and close my eye. Aye aye me maties.

However, this is not the reason for this blogging. The reason for this blogging is that there are a lot of babies occurring at the moment. They are popping out from everywhere. I brought up that old story of a baby being born on the plane means 2 things for the baby:

• Free air travel for life from that airline
• An international passport, granting you passage, work status and pseudo citizenship to any country on the planet.

I did some research. Came up with nothing. Does anyone know of any thing which makes this true? At all?

I would really like to know.

Love and hugs

Wisey

I give up

I don't know what's happened.
I can't even speak english anymore. I've forgotten all my words, I don't know how to structure sentences and I just don't make any sense.

I blame you damn magazines. With your dumb puns and your terrible gossip stories you have driven me to insanity. And I don't even read the articles! I have too many magazines, I only look at the pictures!

I think it also has to do with the fact I'm limited for time and just want to bang out blogs.
I can't do it anymore, it's exhausting and I'm confusing myself.

I love it when this happens and I decide to take a break, because it automatically (by default) brings on the excitement. Let's hope that this little cocky anecdote doesn't jinx it.