Thursday, November 03, 2005

Visual Abuse


I have a memory from my childhood.

The horror abhors me.


Imagine a beautiful summer day, sitting at Doyles, Watsons Bay, and the sun shining on your face, the wind carressing your skin.

You take in the beautiful boats and the water. Your eyes wander across the beach and then...


These two fat middle aged women appear in your line of vision. They have pallid skin and they aren't wearing swimming costumes. Oh no. They have just taken their shirts off and are sitting on the sand in jeans and bras. Gross bras. Faded bras. Fat hanging over the side bras.

Not only do they sit. They move. They walk up and down the beach looking like this.

This, friends, is VISUAL ABUSE!

Any form of human being revealing or wearing something you don't want to see is abuse. Abuse of the visual kind. It's not pretty, please don't let my eyes in.

It goes for any unsightly fat, zits, scars and fashion combinations.

You know what I mean. Don't be shy. We've got the muffin top, the bad colour pallettes, shorts/high heels/fat legs. You know what I'm talking about Willis!

Shield the eyes peeps, prevent nightmares.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

You know that in Italy (and the Italians pride themselves on aesthetics) there are actually beach patrol fashion police who monitor these "abuses." I don't think the beach is supposed to be a catwalk.

Anonymous said...

You know that in Italy (and the Italians pride themselves on aesthetics) there are actually beach patrol fashion police who monitor these "abuses." I don't think the beach is supposed to be a catwalk.

Anonymous said...

You know that in Italy (and the Italians pride themselves on aesthetics) there are actually beach patrol fashion police who monitor these "abuses." I don't think the beach is supposed to be a catwalk.